Disrespectful Behavior vs. Insubordination
Disrespectful behavior and insubordination can overlap, but they are not the same. Insubordination specifically refers to an employee's refusal or intentional failure to follow a direct order from a superior, often accompanied by disrespect. Disrespectful behavior, on the other hand, can manifest in various ways and is not limited to disobeying orders; it can also include rude language, inappropriate comments, or a lack of professionalism towards colleagues or superiors.
Throughout my career, I have observed numerous occurrences of disrespectful behavior that had to be addressed by a supervisor. But clear cases of insubordination where a directive was understood but intentionally refused was a much rarer occurrence. I assume this has something to do with the fact that most employees understand the consequences for insubordination can be serious—up to and including termination.
Employee insubordination is when an employee deliberately disobeys, refuses to follow, or shows open defiance to a reasonable directive or order given by a supervisor. It generally involves:
A clear directive or instruction was given.
The employee understood the instruction.
The employee refused to comply (either verbally or through actions).
Common forms of insubordination include:
Refusing to perform assigned tasks.
Speaking disrespectfully or using offensive language toward a supervisor.
Ignoring company policies or procedures.
Challenging or undermining a supervisor’s authority in front of others.
Sabotaging work or projects.
Disrespectful behavior includes but is not limited to rude or sarcastic behavior, comments, or even body language. It is a behavior directed towards a supervisor that is unprofessional, dismissive, or undermining—but without necessarily refusing a directive. It may include:
Passive-aggressive tone
Eye-rolling, mocking, sarcasm
Dismissive or hostile language
Talking back or raising voice
The potential for overlap: Disrespectful behavior can accompany insubordination or be a precursor to it. For instance, if someone is sarcastic or rude while refusing a directive, they may be guilty of both insubordination and unprofessional conduct.
How to handle the difference:
Insubordination: Address it immediately. Document the refusal and apply progressive discipline if needed.
Disrespect/Rudeness: Address quickly but tactfully. Set clear expectations about communication and professionalism. May not warrant the same level of discipline unless repeated.
Stay calm and professional: Avoid reacting emotionally. Address the situation with a neutral, firm tone to prevent escalation.
Assess the situation: If you believe it was a case of insubordination, confirm the facts.
Was the instruction or directive clear and reasonable?
Did the employee understand what was asked?
Was there a legitimate reason for the refusal (e.g., safety concern, misunderstanding, conflicting priorities)?
Document everything: Keep a detailed record of the incident: what was said, when, who witnessed it, and how the employee responded. Documentation is critical if disciplinary action becomes necessary.
Have a Performance Discussion
Meet with the employee in private to discuss the inappropriate behavior.
Give them a chance to explain their side.
Clarify expectations and consequences for continued defiance.
Apply progressive discipline when appropriate: Follow your organization's disciplinary policy. Common steps include:
Verbal warning
Written warning
Suspension
Termination (in severe or repeated cases)
Reinforce positive culture: Encourage respectful communication and accountability across the team to reduce the risk of future insubordination.
TIP: It’s important for supervisors to know the difference between disrespectful behavior and the rarer but more serious cases of insubordination. While there is a difference, both require the immediate attention of a supervisor and should not be ignored.